23 April 2009

Energy Suckers Identified!


Mr. B. usually comes home in the evening totally exhausted. Even with a full 8 hours sleep, life in the funny farm seems to be taking a lot of his energy. In fact, he gets too tired to even complain about anything. I then realize that it's actually not work itself that made him tired. It's the special breed of humans that did the job. These sub-species is called Energy Suckers. After my extensive analysis based on Mr. B. stories, I was able to identify a few of these creatures:

1. The Drama Queens - These are the people (applicable to both genders) who likes to tell you about their life drama - their family, spouse, children and all the minute details that goes on with their lives - mostly things you couldn't care less about. These people always make sure that you listen and show some signs of empathy, although most of the time, they would make a 180 degree turn and leave even before you make any reaction. And yes, they leave taking most of your energy with them.

2. The Life Teachers - These people knows all about life. In fact, they teach you how to live yours - how to handle your family, how to handle your finances, why you should buy a house, why you should take the bus, why you should be concern about the environment. They really don't care if you do any of the things they say, all they care about is to be able to say their piece to an audience (you), then leave you with zero energy.

3. The What-Do-You-Thinks - These people ask for your opinion about everything - what to eat, what to wear, what to say, what to do, regarding any situation. They are one of the worse because you can't just plug your ears and nod. You have to concoct some sort of response otherwise they would know that you don't care about them (which is not far from the truth).

4. The Empty House - Also one of the higher ranking suckers. You talk to them for hours and watch them nod their heads vigorously. Then you realize something is wrong. Your knock their heads and ask "Anybody Home?" and no one answers. So you go back to square one and don't collect $200. (I told Mr. B. to listen carefully if he hears any juggling sounds while these suckers nod their heads because that could be a sign that it's empty up there).

5. The Fighters - Oh yes, these ones argue with you about anything, everything, the purpose of which is, well, to argue. Sometimes they have their points, most of the time they don't. But in all cases, both you and them will lose track of what was originally being argued about, and leave you lying on the floor catching your breath.

By the end of the day, Mr. B, has me to give him back all the energy he needs. I don't care for dramas, I don't like preaching, I never cared about the opinion of others, I am intelligent and I don't like debates.

That is why I am Mr. B.'s best friend.

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